I was dreading this day. I know your average bride looks forward to it for most of their lives, but for me, dress shopping wasn’t something I was eager to do. Let’s just put it out there, finding dresses to fit my body type is not very easy. Don’t get me wrong, Joseph has made me feel sexy and beautiful for the entirety of our relationship so little by little I’ve started to believe it myself, but it’s still hard finding what I want and what will flatter my figure. So as much as I love shopping, sometimes it can be a daunting task. And as a New Yorker that LOVEEEEEEEES the color black, (hey! its slimming, lol) wearing an all-WHITE dress is not my idea of flattering attire.
The day started the way I felt. It was dreary, rainy AND cold. I woke up late, had one of my notorious headaches and it took me twice as long to get ready because nothing was working properly. I was in the unpleasant abyss that is Murphy’s Law. Everything that could go wrong, did. There was no hot water, my blow dryer was on the fritz, I was so flustered that as I tried to calmly put on makeup, I accidentally spilled tons of blush all over myself! By 9AM I was a hot mess (that happened to be covered in a lovely shade of NARS “Amour”).
I tend to be a little bit of a control freak so I already knew what I did and DID NOT want to try on. I had my book with notes and stickies ready to go but lo and behold, my first choice, my favorite choice, my #1 pick, was NOT available. Actually, let me clarify, they had the dress, they just had it 4 sizes too small! At that point I was ready to delve into the depths of despair (I’m so dramatic lol!).
Everything was going wrong that day and I didn’t have the one person I wanted there the most, my mom. The one person who could soothe my anxiety and then turn around and call me out on my brattiness. Ultimately, deep down, I knew that’s what was really affecting me. You see, as much as we’ve accomplished for the wedding so far, her not being there to help me choose my wedding dress made her loss all the more profound. Dress shopping is a milestone in the relationship between a mother and daughter and I felt like I had been cheated out of the experience. So at this point, all of my nerves were getting the best of me and that’s when my sister came to my rescue…
Celia is generally quieter than I am. She’s the nice one, the shy one. She isn’t loud and dramatic like I am so it’s hard to know what she’s thinking, how she’s feeling or what she’s perceiving. Sometimes she seems oblivious like she isn’t paying attention at all but then she’ll turn around and randomly astonish me with her wisdom and insight. She is the personification of the phrase “still waters run deep.” Even though I was trying to keep my emotions under control (they were raging on the inside but I think I was doing a pretty good job at keeping them hidden) she sensed that something was off with me. That’s when she went into the fitting room with me, took my hand and began to pray. She prayed for me, for my dress and for our day. She said and did everything that my mom would have done without me having to ask her. Immediately my nerves started to subside as she helped zip me into the first dress, an alternative to my number one choice, and the gown I ended up falling in love with.
These photos are of the dresses I tried and liked, but weren’t the “one”. You’ll have to wait for the next post to see it 🙂