We’ve all heard it before – when people get married, they turn into boring couples that spend their weekends at home talking about how to redecorate their homes and not having sex. It’s one of those age-old stereotypes that seems to be perpetuated throughout moves and television as well as real life, so we’re here to reassure you that married life is not as boring as you may think! Here are some of the most common misconceptions about post-wedding life and why you shouldn’t worry about them.
Sex is an important part of any healthy relationship, and although you may not be jumping each other’s bones every second the way you used to when you first started dating, your emotional bond with one another is stronger than ever. That strong emotional connection you have of true love makes sex and intimacy better than you could ever imagine. In addition to the love and passion you’re experiencing, now that you have built this utmost trust between each other, you’re able to experiment and find what both of you really enjoy. And the best part is, if anything awkward or embarrassing happens, you’re able to just laugh it off because you and your partner have the strongest bond two people could have.
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Money and finances are undoubtedly one of the biggest topics that married couples argue about. After getting married, many couples take on the mentality of “what’s mine is yours” and vice versa. Joint bank accounts and credit cards become the norm, and oftentimes one person becomes the primary breadwinner when children become part of the equation. However, it’s easy to lose sight of the common goal if money becomes tight and it becomes easy to blame one another for trivial things. It’s important for all married couples to have both joint and individual bank accounts to ensure financial security as well as financial freedom. Speak openly and clearly about budgeting and costs so that neither of you is surprised when the credit card statement arrives each month. As long as you clearly communicate to one another your expectations and goals about money, you will be able to work through any issues that may arise.
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Now that you’re married and your priority is no longer attracting members of the opposite sex, it is very easy to let go of maintaining your physical appearance. You’re eating less healthfully, working out less and wearing sweatpants more than you ever did before. Although it’s not the end of the world if you and your spouse are not in peak physical shape anymore, it’s important to maintain a healthy lifestyle for your own general wellbeing. Set realistic goals for you and your partner in terms of diet and exercise, and encourage one another to stay active. Sweatpants in the evening and weekends are ok, but try to avoid going out in public wearing pajamas. It’s a circular cycle – if you look good, you will feel good, and your overall self-esteem and happiness will increase.
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When you were single you probably dreaded hanging out with your married friends because all they ever talked about were married couple topics and how they were going to set you up with your perfect mate. Now that the tables have turned, it’s important to make sure that you don’t make your single friends feel the way you felt when you spend time with them. Set aside time to see your single friends and do things that you would have done before you were married (minus the hunting for men part, of course) and try to avoid talking about you and your spouse unless you are asked.
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Getting married doesn’t mean you are adding just one person to your life, but rather a whole extended family. You’re gaining new relatives that you’ll see during family functions and holidays and you could potentially run into them anywhere. Although the stereotype is to have horrific in-laws, it’s actually quite common to have a good relationship with your new “parents.” Even if you happen to feel negatively towards your new family members, remember that these are people that raised your current spouse and made him into the person that he is today. Appreciate the fact that these people are extremely important to someone who is extremely important to you, and make an effort to include them in your new life. It may not be the easiest task, but in marriages both parties need to contribute and realize what is important to one another.
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